another epiphany

Acting is just a day job. Film is a passion, I love it, but at the end of the day, that is not how I want to be defined, as a celebrity. Service to humanity is the best work of life, filmmaking is a means to that end. Just as my job at the video store is a means to becoming a filmmaker. I must never forget that first, I want to help people, everything else I do must adhere to that credo. I must abandon these petty quirks for wisdom, adolescence has been sweet, but it is time to do what must be done.

I feel a twinge of regret as I look back on the person I have become. I don't hate myself enough to change, I will miss this person. The important thing is the person I will become, and that is infinitely better. My heart is my center, everything I do, every move I make comes from that. I will not steal, it will only bring me bad fortune. I must balance my passions with my duties. I must be silent, I must focus. I must strengthen my body as I strengthen my will. I must focus all of my energy towards becoming a filmmaker. I must focus all of my energy towards leaving this place.